A little while ago, I stopped being a nice person. I stopped being generous and kind and giving and I cast aside old notions of selflessness and compassion. Instead, I began taking from life and those around me. I don't now give time or attention, I just take them. I'm no longer considerate or compassionate, because I know others will be those things - both for me and for those who need them. I've gone from being a charitable, forgiving spirit to a mean, hostile, spiteful arsehole.

The change wasn't a totally conscious one, nor was it forced upon me. It just happened, really. And, to be fair, there's been some benefits. I have a lot more free time and I no longer feel like the one who's running around for everybody else. I feel more personally confident, because I no longer give so much of a shit what anyone thinks. I've had more sex with more people in the last year than I ever had before.

But I've had enough. It's getting to the stage where I can't look myself in the eye. Everywhere I go in London that has memories for me seems now tainted with one guilt or another. I've alienated some people to the extent that I've lost (or am losing) other friends who don't want to compromise their network of friends by association with me. It's all well and good being selfish, until it gets to the point where you really only have yourself to look after, and I feel like I'm heading that way.

So, a change, and each journey starts with a single step. This week, every day, I'm going to do something decent and kind and good. I'm not talking about 'going to the gym' good, or 'not leaving the light on when I leave the room' good. I mean an instant, decent action that has a positive effect on someone's self-worth or view of the world. An action that makes someone smile, or feel better, or just feel less bad. An action that, in its performance, takes me one step away from the person I'm becoming and one step back towards the person I used to be, albeit with a higher regard for who that person was.

And, needless to say, I'll tell you all about it.